here we go
02/05/2010 § Leave a comment
Today was the first day in a long time that I woke up with my head screwed on my shoulders all day. I am beginning to understand and realize what it means to live in the present, to stop fidgeting and fussing, to take-in all that I can because shortly it will all end. The peace and tranquility, the green grass and orange sunset, the smell of fresh-cut grass and air of coming rain will all be gone, at least for a little while, as of tomorrow morning, when I join the commuters and make my way West towards the big city.
Arriving at Union Station, backpack in tow, I will be surrounded by pigeons and street-meat vendors, cabbies and cyclists, the suits and cynics. I will take it all in, try to be where it is, see the beauty in its destruction, like I used to. When I was me.
Then I will go to my sister’s place and drop-off my bags, then head West, West, towards what was so that I can shut doors and open windows, drop-off some more baggage if you will, sip coffee that will quench the undying craving, learn to sit and see the change, live it, feel it, instead of be numb to it.
I was talking with my ever-so-wise parents today who told me to stop feeling so numb and to realize that pain just is. You have to feel it to learn to accept it. It’s ok to cry.
So I did.