because i can’t help but see the beauty in everything…

18/04/2012 § Leave a comment

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We are moving. Two years of living in our Sheridan home has proven that time ebbs and flows. There would be restless nights spent laying in my bedroom, mattress still on the floor, listening for and hoping that the critters of the night would leave. Nibble, nibble…

There were all-nighters of dissent and discussion and bottles of wine. There were t.v. shows and movies and mornings with furry kittens. People would come and we people would go.

I try not to think about “moving” too much. It is something that I have done for many years and am quite reflective about it, hoping that each move tells me a little about myself and about my personal goals.

A home is more like a relationship that a transient space, unless you live in a hotel or a tent and even then, a little added personality can go a long way. I remember telling a friend that my concept of home was always centered around my parents’ couches, the staple furniture of our living room. Although they have been re-upholstered, they still carry the same bones that have held me up for over twenty-years. They taught me a lot, those couches, like how to sleep anywhere, how to fit two snugglers into a small space, or three bodies sitting, scrunched together — the comfort that comes from human contact.

Homes also come with memories. They are the places that most feel free to be themselves, to express their personality (through decor or dance) and to invite those that are closest to one’s heart. I guess the home becomes the heart, ingrained with all emotions (happiness, sadness, frustration and knowing that this, too, shall pass…). Sheridan allowed for these times to pass, through blood, sweat and tears and countless nights wondering. No judgments, just existence.

My room was the smallest, white walls and a few “continental” pieces of decoration. It had no closet and when the wind whirled, the walls shook. The window was above the balcony so my early nights in bed were not necessarily spent sleeping as I could hear the world going on below me. Still, every morning I would wake to some form of nature calling, whether it be the birds (cardinals and blue jays) or the choir of clouds at dawn’s break. Despite the rooms perks and flaws, it taught me about the things I could live with  (dryers turning, people chatting, critters nibbling) and the things I could not do without…

I need bigger windows.

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